You’ve been asked to write and deliver a toast or speech at for a special occasion ... and now the panic’s kicking in.
Picture this … your best friend’s wedding, your dad’s 70th, your daughter’s engagement. The spotlight swings your way, glasses clink, everyone’s eyes are focused on you. You're about to deliver your special occasion speech, and what does your brain do? It goes completely blank.
Sound familiar?
You’re not alone. Speaking at a special event feels like a big deal, because it is. You want to be warm, funny, heartfelt, not awkward, cringey, or accidentally offensive. You want to honour the moment and make people feel something real. But the last thing you want is for people to be feeling embarrassed for you.
The good news? You don’t need to be a natural at public speaking. You just need a few tricks, and a bit of time to prepare.
Step 1: Plan before you write that toast or speech
Whether you’re speaking at a wedding, a birthday, or a milestone celebration, learning how to write and deliver a wedding toast or birthday speech doesn’t have to be stressful. With the right approach, it can even be enjoyable.
Even professional speakers don’t wing important speeches. That trick only works in films.
In real life, the magic is in the preparation. Take the time to jot down what you want to say. Focus on:
- A personal memory
- A compliment or story that shows who they are
- A genuine wish for the future
That’s your gold. From there, you shape the tone—funny, sweet, formal, casual—whatever suits the occasion and you.
Step 2: Keep it short
Aim for under 3 minutes. No one came for a TED Talk about the groom’s postgrad research on marine ecosystems.
Pick one or two meaningful moments or memories and let them shine. Less is more—especially when there’s wine and cake involved.
Step 3: What to avoid in a special occasion speech
Avoid:
- Inside jokes: If people don’t get the joke, it’s awkward. Include all the audience so they're interested in what you have to say.
- Embarrassing stories: Embarrassing tales can backfire. You’re not here to roast them.
- Too much “liquid courage”: Save the champagne until after you spoken. Speak first, celebrate after. You've practised and you've got this. Trust us.
Step 4: Practice with real people
Yes, practising in front of the dog, or the mirror, helps. But practising with an actual human, who can give you feedback, is a game-changer.
This is where Toastmasters comes in. At Miranda Toastmasters, we’ve helped loads of people nail speeches for weddings, birthdays, retirements, and more.
You can rehearse your speech in a relaxed, supportive space and get constructive feedback that actually helps. It’s the safest way to fine-tune your timing, tone, and delivery before the big moment.
Remember to give yourself enough time to prepare, practice, and feel comfortable. Confidence builds with practice—don’t expect it to magically show up on cue.
Step 5: End with heart
Wrap things up on a note that leaves people smiling ... or reaching for tissues if that's your aim:
- A toast: “Here’s to love, laughter, and a lifetime of adventures.”
- A wish: “May this be the start of all their best memories.”
- Or simply pause, smile, and add eye contact. Understated, but incredibly powerful.
One final thought
You don’t have to be perfect. You just have to be genuine. Speak from the heart, keep it simple, and give yourself a chance to enjoy the moment too.
So what's next?
Ready to craft your wedding toast or birthday speech with real people?
Join us at Miranda Toastmasters. We’ll help you turn that fear into focus—and maybe even a little fun.
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Find out more at www.miranda-toastmasters.org.au.